Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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