Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I met the friendliest cop last night
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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