You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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