im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
