Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
