Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
