You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
