I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
