i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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