so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
