I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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