Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize