I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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