i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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