he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
