During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
