so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Randomize