where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just pee around me
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
