I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
