i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize