So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
