Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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