just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize