you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
