Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
