I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
