question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
this is an emotional support booty call
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Randomize
