look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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