Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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