god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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