I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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