Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize