Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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