He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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