What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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