there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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