so explain again why im purple
no
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
