He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
