did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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