The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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