Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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