He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
