True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
