yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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