at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize