I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
