So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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