my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize
