Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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