NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
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