DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
i wish my penis had a tongue
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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